Cheating?

[dirtrider73068]

yeh, dirtrider, I like it here too. One other thing....being up front with someone doing do crap. Like your going to be in a heart-to-heart with someone and tell them that you have trust issues and they are going to immediately save you by saying something like "well, you don't want to hang with me then...cause I'll stab ya in the back in your sleep!"

All it's going to do is make someone feel like they've taken on a mental case and until they get to know you, that's exactly what you will appear to be. Not fair? Of course not, but heck....I know I have a million other things to worry about without having to worry if my friend misunderstood something I said because he/she is looking for something wrong with me.

I understood some this except for the "being up front with someone doing do crap." But given your opion for something like this, how would you want to know? Would it rather be up front and honest? Or being untrusting and you wondering if they are being honest? Me I would want someone to be upfront and truthful si would know what to do to either 1) make it better for both partys or 2) lookout bad road ahead. Since I have been in the bad road and seen the distrust, I have been truthful in everything I have done and said, part of being the way I was raise, if caught lying, about anything it was butt beating and grounding so I learned real fast be trustworthy and never lie.

[TomGirl]

lol!! I meant to write "being up front with someone doesn't do crap", but if you read the previous post, it's not about what your talking about, it's about meeting new people (friends)and being up front about the fact that you find it hard to trust anyone, that it won't help because people are not going to blurt out that that plan to use you, lie to you or try to sleep with your wife/husband, etc.

What you posted is a little unclear too...but one thing that leaps out at me is "I would want someone to be upfront and truthful", do you know someone that wouldn't want this? I think...I'm no expert...just logical...that when friendships and relationship begin, most believe that the other is telling the truth, how do you really know when someone is lying about something? You don't...going back to the original claim that there is and never will be any "guarantee" that someone will never be cheated on, it can happen to anyone, but living in the fear is only hurting yourself.

I take my time getting to know people, this, I believe, is the best way to go. Even ol "upfront & honest" dirtrider...yes you...would and will do some type of "selling yourself" during a first date, even if it's just leaving out the things you don't really want the other to know until they've gotten to know you better. Time as friends, just friends, would eventually reveal the little downfalls and if a relationship still sparks later, you have the friendship, which is most important, you already know everything BEFORE the relationship, not during.