Hysterical public shaming via social media

[Pete]

We've commented on this phenomena before: Something goes on Facebook and Twitter and people get outraged and then there is this rabid piling on.

I've said before it's almost like people *want* to be outraged, and bashiing/judging someone else makes them somehow feel better about themselves.

It's a very strange and unexpected consequence of social media and how one tweet or post can bring the whole world down upon a person, sometimes with grave consequences.

Very interesting article by the NY Times:

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/02/15/ma...life.html?_r=0

[bradh]

I read this over the weekend, it's very interesting. More interesting is the "I don't give an F" attitude of the guy who started the whole deal with that Jessica girl.

[Bellaboo]

This is another reason I refuse to access Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc.

Not giving any of them my time.

[AP]

I read this over the weekend, it's very interesting. More interesting is the "I don't give an F" attitude of the guy who started the whole deal with that Jessica girl.

I think I read it from a tweet you retweeted actually.

[bradh]

I think I read it from a tweet you retweeted actually.

you favorited it or retweeted, so I assume you read it lol

[Achilleslastand]

If facebook and twitter, etc up and vanished tomorrow I know I wouldn't bat an eyelash.

[rezman]

Pete, You are so correct. And it's not an "almost" sort of thing. Many people now days DO look for the next outrage, the next crisis,... the next opportunity to pile on. They thrive on drama and anything to run somebody else down the road. Just one of the reasons we moved and took my daughter out of her old school.

Like Ballaboo, I too refuse to participate in Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, or any others as well. Never have and don't plan to start.

[bradh]

Refusing to use it is fine, but you're really missing out on a great tool to interact with friends and family, and in the case of Twitter, enjoy live sports in a way never before possible with to the second analysis. But I totally get if you want to opt out, because as with anything it's not perfect, and there is some garbage to sift through.

In the respect of high profile people using it, I think Jim Rome put it best, Twitter is like a loaded gun for athletes, celebrities, politicians, etc.

[adaniel]

I'm really of two minds concerning this issue.

I agree that social justice keyboard warriors are really getting out of hand. The "outrage industry" has always been there but social media has really just taken it to the extreme. Sam Biddle, the Gawker writer mentioned in that NY Times Story, was really one of the worst IMO. Valleywag is pretty terrible in general.

At the same time, none of those people profiled were particularly sympathetic. Why anyone would tweet an AIDs joke concerning race is beyond me. Would you say something like that to a stranger on the street, especially if he/she was African?

I can tell you my company recently passed on a new accounting hire because a casual search of his twitter feed revealed several racist and misogynistic statements. It was a big deal considering this person would have had a Hispanic, female supervisor.

I think Louis CK said it best. When you say something nasty to someone's face, you have to look at their facial expression. You have to face the consequence that what you said bothers them. When you just fire off a tweet or text, you don't have to look at their face, and at least in the short term, you don't have to face any potential backlash from the other person.

I think social media has made people incredibly desensitized to the affect that their words and actions may have. My rule is, if you are not okay with what you say being posted on a billboard, don't put it out there for the world to see.

[BBatesokc]

Social media isn't the enemy, its social behavior. And that cuts both ways.....

The behavior of those profiled was ill-advised and the reaction to that behavior was disproportionate to the perceived offense.

Personally, in many ways, I think the lack of shame is what is wrong with much of society today. We don't feel shame for anything we do or put on display for the public's consumption. The problem in today's techno lynch mobs is the shame no longer comes from your circle of influence but from the often anonymous piling on of others who, if not for your public actions, would probably have no idea you even existed at all.

Much to be learned on both sides of the table if you ask me.

[Pete]

Accountability is important and I agree that it doesn't happen as much as it should.

And while the harmed individuals in that article were not very sympathetic, the one lady with the AIDS joke (really, really stupid) only had just over 100 followers, probably just her friends. So I'm sure she never realized others would see it but for some reason someone picked it up and then it was re-tweeted all over the place.

We all have friends and acquaintances who still make inappropriate jokes and comments, although that sort of thing is rapidly dwindling. But many don't realize what they post on the Internet is immediately out of their hands and can be shared with anyone, anywhere. Even once you delete or edit something, the original is likely still out there outside your direct control.

And really, the same is true with email. I try to be very careful not to put anything in electronic writing that I would not want others to see, because that can very easily happen, accidentally or otherwise.


Anyway, accountability works both ways. There is absolutely no accountability for those who vindictively bash, threaten and even publish private information about someone simply because they may disagree with their viewpoint or choices.

And beyond that, there is an obvious social hunger for jumping on someone who wrote or said something not to your liking and I'd really like to see some backlash against this practice.

[Bullbear]

I really try to limit my facebook friends and never got the hang of twitter.. I find the more people I cut out of my facebook the more I enjoy the experience. and never at any cost read the comments on a news stations post.

[PhiAlpha]

Too bad Sally Kern isn't shamed by public shaming...

[MadMonk]

Thanks for that article. I'm sending it to my teenage daughter. I've been constantly on her case about her online activities and her seemingly cavalier attitude about her personal privacy. This will help it hit home, I'm sure.

[traxx]

It's not the technology. Technology just makes it easier. It's society in this day and age. People want to be outraged about something. If you look hard enough, you can always find something to be offended by. And if it doesn't personally affect you, then be offended and outraged on behalf of those that are affected. And the go-to punishment is to ask for the person to lose their job. Sure, the lady shouldn't made such a joke on twitter. That was a bad deicision. But who here hasn't had a friend make a joke they know is in bad taste? And we know it's bad but we laugh anyway because we know no harm was really intended. Or maybe you've been the one to make such a joke. But should you really lose your job because you made a bad joke? The punishment isn't fitting the crime.

I've been around people that have made bad jokes or jokes that offend me, but I don't go tell their boss to fire them. We've just become so overly sensitive as a society. We're offended by every little thing.

I remember in the '90s hearing about some politician that said niggardly while speaking about a budget. People became offended because they thought it was a racial slur. And even after it was explained tha the term had nothing to do with race they didn't relent. Even though the etymology of the two words are completely different, people wanted to be outraged at a percieved offense and wounldn't let it rest. Which it does less to show the percieved racism of the person who said than it does to show the ignorance of those offended by it.

Now we've got all this social technology that allows us to succumb to mob mentality even though we may be separated by distance. Just look at how Bill Cosby has been tried, convicted and sentenced in the court of public opinion with nothing more than accusations. I'm not saying Cosby is or isn't guilty, but he has yet to be able to defend himself fairly in court with sworn testimony and actual evidence. I'm sure Cosby isn't hurting for money, but again, he's lost jobs because of the mob mentality that social media has allowed us. And we, as a society, are refusing to be responsible stewards of our power on social media. And the writer who ruthlessly crucified the lady for her offhand, off color joke got a taste of his own medicine at the hands of social media when he made an off handed remark. We should all be careful of our percieved righteous indignation because it could come back to bite us.

[Pete]

Before social media and the ability for everyone to easily assert their self-righteousness, another outlet has always been the schadenfreude over public figures; celebrities, politicians, athletes, etc.

There still is of course, but I think what we see now with the piling on non-public figures is a direct extension of that same mentality: The desire among many to see others fail.


A therapist friend told me this a long time ago and it's simple but oh-so-true: The only reason anyone cares about something someone else does (unless they are directly impacted) is a reflection of their own self esteem.

In other words, people who don't feel good about themselves are often looking for reasons to feel better, and pointing out the failures of others is the easiest way to make that happen.

And when I find myself getting bothered over something, I always run a little check to see if it's just my own insecurity kicking in. More often than not, that is exactly the case and I then try my best to own up to that and just let it go.

[PennyQuilts]

A therapist friend told me this a long time ago and it's simple but oh-so-true: The only reason anyone cares about something someone else does (unless they are directly impacted) is a reflection of their own self esteem.

In other words, people who don't feel good about themselves are often looking for reasons to feel better, and pointing out the failures of others is the easiest way to make that happen.

Pete, I think there was a time when what your friend counseled was true and that hasn't gone away in face to face relationships. But I also think it has become very much part of the online culture to be perpetually outraged, seek public approval, do a high five to score a snarky take down, use nasty, awful language and slurs, and constantly seek attention by virtue of claiming victimhood or advocate for other victims. The most polite debate quickly turns to personal attacks without close moderation. The use of shame on public media plays into that sometimes pathological relationship in ways it does not in face to face relationships. It is easy to shame a faceless person on the internet and we see it all the time. Seeing real tears evokes a completely different reaction. I've seen men on this forum and other places just be horrible with no consideration for the feelings of their target. The more they hurt, the meaner they get like a mob. There is no doubt in my mind that nearly every one of them would be crushed if they caused someone in their presence to cry at their words.

[Mel]

"techno lynch mobs" Thank you, stealing that one.

[zookeeper]

"techno lynch mobs" Thank you, stealing that one.

But then there would be outrage for using the word "lynch." Sometimes it's easier to not get out of bed in the morning.

[Zorba]

Thanks for posting the article.

I do feel sympathy for the people profiled in the story. Almost everyone has told an off-colored joke, said something wrong or something they regret at least once. There are jokes I'd say in front of my friends and family that I'd never say to a stranger (or tweeter for that matter). If you go to any comedy club, you will hear much worse than that AIDS "joke."

Something I learned at my last job, people truly expect much more from others than they do from themselves, and the more anonymous that other person is the more they expect from them. The same engineers that produced error filled paperwork as a matter of course, were the same ones that wanted mechanics fired for mis-drilling one hole (out of hundreds). See people understand why they themselves erred, so they can accept it in themselves or a family member. But that random guy over there? He has no excuse!

Now take that to the internet where everyone in anonymous, typically there is no context, no inflection, no body language and seemingly no sense of humor, people take it to an extreme. The same joke that would get a head shake in real life, gets death threats online and people calling for your job.

Another part of it, is I think people have become less social and have less friends in real life, so being caught up in the daily outrage and attack allows them to feel like they are part of the tribe. It also doesn't help that many "news" outlets have conditioned people to outraged all the time about everything, facts be damned.

[zookeeper]

Thanks for posting the article.

I do feel sympathy for the people profiled in the story. Almost everyone has told an off-colored joke, said something wrong or something they regret at least once. There are jokes I'd say in front of my friends and family that I'd never say to a stranger (or tweeter for that matter). If you go to any comedy club, you will hear much worse than that AIDS "joke."

Something I learned at my last job, people truly expect much more from others than they do from themselves, and the more anonymous that other person is the more they expect from them. The same engineers that produced error filled paperwork as a matter of course, were the same ones that wanted mechanics fired for mis-drilling one hole (out of hundreds). See people understand why they themselves erred, so they can accept it in themselves or a family member. But that random guy over there? He has no excuse!

Now take that to the internet where everyone in anonymous, typically there is no context, no inflection, no body language and seemingly no sense of humor, people take it to an extreme. The same joke that would get a head shake in real life, gets death threats online and people calling for your job.

Another part of it, is I think people have become less social and have less friends in real life, so being caught up in the daily outrage and attack allows them to feel like they are part of the tribe. It also doesn't help that many "news" outlets have conditioned people to outraged all the time about everything, facts be damned.

I agree. Very well said.

[stick47]

couldn't help myself. had to repost...

[BBatesokc]

Of course, had any of those people profiled in the article been named Sarah Silverman the reaction would have been non-existent.

[borchard]

Social media isn't the enemy, its social behavior. And that cuts both ways.....

The behavior of those profiled was ill-advised and the reaction to that behavior was disproportionate to the perceived offense.

Personally, in many ways, I think the lack of shame is what is wrong with much of society today. We don't feel shame for anything we do or put on display for the public's consumption. The problem in today's techno lynch mobs is the shame no longer comes from your circle of influence but from the often anonymous piling on of others who, if not for your public actions, would probably have no idea you even existed at all.

Much to be learned on both sides of the table if you ask me.

BB, I was wondering if you are using the drone in your other pursuits? Seems like it might be much less dangerous than "handy-camming" the stuff on S. Robinson :-)

[BBatesokc]

BB, I was wondering if you are using the drone in your other pursuits? Seems like it might be much less dangerous than "handy-camming" the stuff on S. Robinson :-)

I have it with me often and I've used it only once so far. I have a lot of set rules for how I go about my activism to try and ensure I stay within the law and more importantly that I insure my safety and those directly and indirectly involved at that moment. Only once has all those conditions been met and I felt comfortable enough to launch the drone. All the other times there were either power lines in the immediate area, children out playing, too much vehicular traffic, too windy, space was too confined or Air One was in the area. I do agree though, my thought is if all other conditions exist, the drone is a much safer approach than on foot. However, in reality, anyone who follows my activism knows that I haven't posted a video in months and even then I rarely do - maybe a couple of videos in an entire year. In 2012 the environment regarding the issue start making a big change and I prefer to work directly with groups like No Boundaries and spend much less time on the streets unless I have a very specific goal for that moment (like shooting a new awareness campaign video, working with local, national or international media outlets, etc.).