Do you speak Oklahoman?

[TheTravellers]

Lost Ogle ran this, pretty funny, I'll check it out when I get home (FB is blocked at work):

KOCO wants to know if you speak Oklahoman | The Lost Ogle

"While it’s nice to see words that are distinct to Oklahoma and the region, regular words don’t mean the same thing in Oklahoma as they do in the rest of the country. Many seemingly straight-forward words have a completely different meaning in Oklahoma.

For example:

Bleeding heart liberal: Moderate Democrat or Republican who believes we shouldn’t euthanize the homeless.

Science: Atheism.

Homosexual: Person who has been possessed by the Devil and is a licensed terrorist.

Global Warming: Myth perpetuated by bleeding heart liberals to turn your children into homosexuals.

The Oklahoman: Our version of Fox News

Tornado: Go outside and take pictures

Beaver: Town with funny name

Gun: The Object that Jesus Christ gifted mankind for making America a strictly Christian nation.

Mathis Brothers Salesman: Stalker / Pet Shop Attendant

Salad: Vehicle for Ranch dressing.

Ranch Dressing: Juice.

Obesity: Hereditary genetic disease with no cure.

The State Fair of Oklahoma: Real life GRINDR meet-up.

Sexual Intercourse: Dirty and sinful, unless you are married and doing it to have a child.

Barack HUSSEIN Obama: Hitler and Stalin’s love child."

[Plutonic Panda]

Bleeding heart liberal: Moderate Democrat or Republican who believes we shouldn’t euthanize the homeless.

Science: Atheism.

Homosexual: Person who has been possessed by the Devil and is a licensed terrorist.

Global Warming: Myth perpetuated by bleeding heart liberals to turn your children into homosexuals.

The Oklahoman: Our version of Fox News

Tornado: Go outside and take pictures

Beaver: Town with funny name

Gun: The Object that Jesus Christ gifted mankind for making America a strictly Christian nation.

Mathis Brothers Salesman: Stalker / Pet Shop Attendant

Salad: Vehicle for Ranch dressing.

Ranch Dressing: Juice.

Obesity: Hereditary genetic disease with no cure.

The State Fair of Oklahoma: Real life GRINDR meet-up.

Sexual Intercourse: Dirty and sinful, unless you are married and doing it to have a child.

Barack HUSSEIN Obama: Hitler and Stalin’s love child.

HA I love it!!!

[Dennis Heaton]

The Oklahoman, Tornado, Mathis Brother Salesman, and Barack HUSSEIN Obama...