Describe your date from beginning to end (for the guys)

[mranderson]

Guys. Describe the steps of your typical date.

From when you ask her, to when you pick her up, to what you do (in other words, are you a gentleman and open doors for her, etc. and describe things like that), what you do when you take her back home?

Also any blunders (and how she reacted to them).

Here is mine to give you an idea what I mean.



I usually ask her if she has plans for a certain day. If she does not, then if she want to have dinner. I like to let her select the place (within reason).

Before I get there, I will stop someplace and buy some flowers (usually three roses in her favorite color). This is something I do on every outing I consider a date.

When we leave I always open the door for her and make sure she is seated. We then proceed to the place we agreed on.

When we arrive, I like to once again open doors for her. Then, when we decide on what to eat, she orders first.

We talk and eat. Then (on the first date this is the test) I ask her if she wants to do a movie or something. If she wants to just go home, that may be an indication she thinks I am Lou Zuhr. If she wants a movie, again, I let her select.

While she is in the ladies room (which usually happens) I pay.

We go to the movie and maybe walk around before or after. Then I take her home.

We will talk for a bit, then a light peck of a kiss, then goodnight and I usually tell her I enjoyed the evening and ask if she has plans for the next weekend.

I then go home.

Sidenote: 90% of the dates I have had, the next day I have gotten a dear John email.

[Leon]

OK.....new to this, but, NEVER a movie on a first date.....that's two hours of silence....wasted, precious time....two of the most important hours there can be.

First date: lunch on a weekday, an hour, or see what's happening around town on a weekend. To me it wouldn't matter what it is, tractor pulls or art show.....remember the rhyme....walking and talking. You will not get any closer sitting in a theater watching a chick-flick......Doesn't matter what it is.....find something that allows you to talk.

The best first date to me: Meet at a decent restuarant (Appplebees, Chili's) have LUNCH, (I' d be happy to pay) exchange email addresses and promise/SWEAR to each other to wait 28 hours before emailing (part of me says three days). I say 28 because that's one day plus a few hours to get home and email from there.

Most importantly, be ready to NOT expect a further phone call or email after the first time together. And if YOU email after 28 hours, just say "Hi.".....In other words, start as if new with the follow-up. If she's interested, she'll recommend doing the same thing or something similar again.

[Leon]

I think that if she touches you....and depending on how....an attempted kiss MIGHT fit in. Note whether she touches a lot or just shakes your hand.

A knowledgable woman MIGHT recognize how difficult it is for us.....They "DO" call the shots whether they realize it or not.

On one hand, I love them, they are what makes life worth living. On the other hand, they had to originate from the mouth of Hell and are here simply to torture us. So split the difference, stay neutral, protect your own feelings, let them determine where the two of you stand. PROTECT YOUR OWN FEELING FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rule Number 1: NEVER be the first to indicate feelings.....NEVER!!!!!!!

And if you screw up and do so, prepare yourself to get bent over and screwed without lube.

I promise myself to never tell a woman I care for her before she says she cares for me.....a slow learner I am, most fellas learned that in high school.

[sweetdaisy]

"On one hand, I love them, they are what makes life worth living. On the other hand, they had to originate from the mouth of Hell and are here simply to torture us."

LOL!!!

Leon, based on your posts, you seemed to be a little on the edgy side last nite. You doing okay?

[pdjr]

Can't comment on this one. I've forgotten what it is like dating a girl decades ago. I switched teams.

[Leon]

"On one hand, I love them, they are what makes life worth living. On the other hand, they had to originate from the mouth of Hell and are here simply to torture us."

LOL!!!

Leon, based on your posts, you seemed to be a little on the edgy side last nite. You doing okay?

Doin' okay, no....I need a woman!...No...wait,....a woman's the last thing I need!....Awe....I don't know. Help!

Sweetdaisy, I'm glad you got a little laugh outta that. I guess my posts will swing from one extreme to the other until I get through this turbulance. Keeping my eyes wide open but my heart's doors sealed shut.

[sweetdaisy]

Doin' okay, no....I need a woman!...No...wait,....a woman's the last thing I need!....Awe....I don't know. Help!

Sweetdaisy, I'm glad you got a little laugh outta that. I guess my posts will swing from one extreme to the other until I get through this turbulance. Keeping my eyes wide open but my heart's doors sealed shut.

It's completely understandable, Leon. I get some good giggles out of some of your comments, but overall I feel badly for you. I know you're going through a really tough time right now and you have my prayers and support.

There's many times that I ask myself why it can't be easier considering everyone's basically looking for the same thing...happiness with someone you love.

[Leon]

It's because of peoples' pasts. You gotta have more in common than lust for each other. I've done a little reading about relationships, anything I happen across. You know, statistically, (for what numbers are worth) the best chance for a successful relationship is with one who's has a similar life history and actually is similar in appearance to one's self....a 4x greater chance!

I can attribute a lot, I think, of my failed marriage's problems to the differences in the ways we were raised, and the experiences we had in our youth. A lot comes from there: your values, your perception of money, your self confidence/security, the goals you think you can reach in life, expectations....those are some core elements of a marriage.

[sweetdaisy]

Good info to have.

Similar history and background? Hmmm...now I'm really up a creek.

[Leon]

Can't be worse than mine.