A funny thing happened

[mranderson]

I had contact not long ago from a woman who dumped me a while back. Here is what happend.

She had fallen for another guy instead of me, and had dumped me for him saying there were things I said that she didn't like. I hadn't realized I said the things. Plus, she said she was not attracted to me. I had to write her to get her to tell me why, in fact. The dump was on instant message.

Well. Guess what? Mister fabuolus dumped her... How? Instant message. How fitting. After she cried, she contacted me to tell me. I was quite gracious about the thing, especially when she talked about "justice." What she meant is she knew what it was like to be dumped by instant message... And it hurt a great deal to have it happen. She couldn't appologize enough for hurting me. I could tell she was sincere.

We talked for an hour catchig up. Will we go out? That is up to her. She would have to ask me. Then, if I agree, we will need to have an understanding. Things will be quite different, epecially communiation.

I think God is saying something to her. Well... Dumpee wins one for a change. I must admit. I fell for her very hard and would really like a chance, but a fair one.

What would you do, guys?

[karlanee]

You're a sucker to go out with her again. But to each his own.

Read your own tag line - there's your answer. If she left you once - she'll probably leave you again. If it looks like a cheater, acts like a cheater, must be a cheater.

[mranderson]

You're a sucker to go out with her again. But to each his own.

Read your own tag line - there's your answer. If she left you once - she'll probably leave you again. If it looks like a cheater, acts like a cheater, must be a cheater.

I am not saying I will take her back. The point of the post is poetic Justice... And she actually admitted that it was before I could even think about saying it. Her communication was an appology.

[karlanee]

We talked for an hour catchig up. Will we go out? That is up to her. She would have to ask me. Then, if I agree, we will need to have an understanding. Things will be quite different, epecially communiation.

I think God is saying something to her. Well... Dumpee wins one for a change. I must admit. I fell for her very hard and would really like a chance, but a fair one.

What would you do, guys?

I guess by your words, I thought you were considering going out with her again. I wasn't saying you should or shouldn't - just that you are a sucker if you do. You asked for opinions - I gave you mine.

"Burn me once, shame on you. Burn me twice, shame on me"

[sweetdaisy]

I'm right there with karlanee. Mr. Anderson, don't get sucked in again! It's not worth it, plus, she'll start viewing you as her "go to" guy and you will become her new doormat.

This is actually happening to me right now. My ex, who lives in Michigan, is realizing how important I was to him and how he can't function properly without me being a bigger part of his life. I told him, the same thing karlanee just said "you duped me once, so shame on you, but if you dupe me twice, shame on me". Not gonna happen this time, buddy!

Just tell her you're sorry she's hurting and you appreciate her apology. Then leave her alone. It's better to be alone than to be with someone out of desperation. Good luck, Mr. Anderson.

[sweetdaisy]

Oh, and I forgot to say, it's certainly more than okay to bask in the glow of being "right". A little taste of justice can be great for the ego!

[mranderson]

The power of prayer paid off on this one. Here is what I did that way.

"Some people are like Slinkies. They really aren't much good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs."

[dirtrider73068]

IMO she had the chance the first time with you and blew it adn chose somebody else, i fit was me i would tell her that exact way you were giving her a chance the first time but for some unknown reason fron her, or a excuse from her she chose another guy. But this time she was suckered in, and not suckering in the guy. To me some girls get a kick out of bounceig guy to guy, just to watch them hurt when we get dumped. I am not saying all girls just a few. I am sure guys do it to but on more betting level. If I had given a lady a chance to date me and get to know me and she doesn't take that chacne and dumps me for another guy then comes CRYING and WHINENG back wanting to maybe hook up. Sorry this ship has already sailed.

[Jay]

Congrats Mr. Anderson its always nice when someone who screwed you over gets thier payback. Especially when karma and fate do all the work for you.

This reminds me of my last serious relationship. She told me she wanted to see other people. I was okay with that and had no issues. (I was in the military. When you deploy all the time break-ups become a fact of life) Ironically I met someone two days prior through friends that I would have asked out at the time but, I was still seeing my ex.

A couple of days later I had just got home from my first date with the girl I met through friends and my ex calls me. She is crying and admits she left for someone she had a crush on. They went on a date, slept together and he told her he no longer wanted to see her . I gave her my condolences and explained to her I had met someone. I talked to her long enough to calm her down and told her that it was over she made the descision and I had to move on. She learned the hard way the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence.

I was not about to be a safety net. In my opinion when you say you want to end it you beter be sure that is what you want.

[pdjr]

This reminds me of the Sex and the City episode where Carrie got dumped via Post-It note. Now that would be harsh.

[Leon]

........dumped me for him saying there were things I said that she didn't like. I hadn't realized I said the things.

.......The dump was on instant message.

.......She couldn't appologize enough for hurting me. I could tell she was sincere.

........I must admit. I fell for her very hard and would really like a chance, but a fair one.

What would you do, guys?

We all have our own personalities and opinions; if she didn't like things you said before, she probably wont like them now. Come-on....would a woman really expect to change the man? I've heard that before.

The IM dump: Is THAT how much she respected you then. Consider how she must have determined that that was the best way to break it off....That's called GUILT. She couldn't look you in the eye.

[mranderson]

I actually posted this just to say sometimes we get even by just doing nothing... And it feels nice.

I would like to thank all of you for your opinion as to the possibility of her and I reconsiling. Including some people at work, and the input of Keith and Patrick in email, it was 10 to zero... All said forget her. She dumped you and she learned how it feels. I doubt I will go back.

As the late Jackie Gleason said as his signature line... "How SWEEEET it is..." And Wesley Snipes in "Major League." "Yes, Yes, Yes." Need I say more?

[Curt]

You're a sucker to go out with her again. But to each his own.

Read your own tag line - there's your answer. If she left you once - she'll probably leave you again. If it looks like a cheater, acts like a cheater, must be a cheater.

Once a cheater, always a cheater. Dont take her back. I did that once, never again.

[mranderson]

I would lay odds that even though she appologized and showed remorse, that next time she dumps a guy it is by instant message. If it is, I ertainly hope next time SHE gets dumped, the guy is not kind.

[Leon]

If it's due to guilt, probably so.....IMing again.

[dirtrider73068]

Well you could start date her make a excuse and dump her by like she did and ask her how did it feel, but she already had that happened so she knows how it feels. I wouldn't trust a woman for dumping me for another guy only to come back for a shoulder to cry on, unless more was to happen other than that she would be long gone is my book. SHe had the chance the first time and blew. Like I said before, sorry this ship has already sailed.