Vatican Appends Appended List of Sins

[kmf563]

by doglord


Oops! The Vatican did it again! A day after updating its original sins with modern sins like polluting and pushing drugs, the Vatican is back with eight more modern sins.

“Now that I think about it,” the Pope said, on a conference call with theology beat reporters, “There are a few other transgressions that really get up my nose.”

These additional, or addendum sins, include:

• Ruining the “wide stance” defense for the rest of us;
• Using walkie-talkie phones…ever;
• Ending every statement with “fool”;
• Ditching your perfectly good SUV for a Prius;
• Male lower-back tattoos;
• Carrot Top;
• Texting one person while “talking” to another;
• Defending Tom Cruise.

Really tiresome **** that apparently didn’t make the “sin” cut this time around include perennial moral lapses mime, farting under the blankets, and reality shows.

Receiving serious consideration for the next Vatican sin update are flacking for Hillary Clinton and persecuting others while banging prostitutes at four grand-a-pop.

Dogtown Ink


LOL

[Midtowner]

No! Not dutch ovens!!!

[jbrown84]

#1 and #5 are the best. HAHA

[RoboNerd]

Why isn't spamming on that list? I want all spammers to burn in the lowest depths of hell, buried in enlargement pills, fake diplomas, and cheap watch imitations.

[PennyQuilts]

Talking on a cell phone in a restaurant or other closed area. Not only is that a mortal sin, it should be grounds for justifiable homocide. Unfortunately, it is frequently a grandma talking delightedly to her grandson. In that case - what can you do? Hard to tell a grandma that she is being horribly rude.

[Dark Jedi]

Really. Why do normal people, who speak in normal voices any other time
BECOME HORRIBLE SHOUTING MENACES AS SOON AS THEY ANSWER THEIR DAMN PHONE?

[Oh GAWD the Smell!]

#1 and #5 are the best. HAHA

Yeah, and "Gigolo Stamp" doesn't roll off the tongue quite as well as "Tramp Stamp".

Why isn't spamming on that list? I want all spammers to burn in the lowest depths of hell, buried in enlargement pills, fake diplomas, and cheap watch imitations.

You know...I NEVER got a single spam email concerning cheap/imitation watches until I gave Tag Heuer my email address. How weird is that?