Donor sued for child support

[Garin]

Kansas man who donated sperm to lesbian couple being sued by state for child support - NY Daily News


So because the procedure wasn't done by a doctor, this guy is considered the father? What is the difference a Dixie cup full of sperm, a turkey baster, and a lesbian or a fertility clinic. If this goes through then every donor out there better start worrying.

[MWCGuy]

As they say the devil is in the details so always get it in writing. All he had to do is call up a lawyer, have him/her write up a contract. That is benefit of most donation clinics. You sign away all rights and responsiblities the minute you recieve your payment for your donation.

[kevinpate]

His trouble was he and they ran afoul of a state law that permits what was attempted,
donating without financial responsibility, only when the artificial insemination is overseen
by a doctor.

Whether the decision to not involve a doctor was a lack of knowledge of the state's law,
or an effort to save the funds that may have been a part of a doctor's involvement, it put
the donor and the couple outside the law, irrespective of whatever document they drew
up between themselves.

A 1/2 to 1 hour hour consultation with a KS lawyer would have saved the guy a bundle.
As it stands now, he is either obligated for support for the nearly two decades until the
child becomes an adult, or he is out the umpteen thousands it will cost for an appeal,
or both.

The price of a legal consult would have likely fallen between 0 and 600, depending
on the choice of counsel and length of the consult.

[Servicetech571]

Anybody else see this going into the politics forum?

[RadicalModerate]

Anybody else see this going into the politics forum?

Maybe this one and "Four Blood Moons" could trade places?

[kevinpate]

Anybody else see this going into the politics forum?

Nor reason it should. It is a current topic, and likely a short lived one at that.

[Martin]

old news... kansas ruled that the man is responsible for child support... Kansas court says sperm donor must pay child support - CNN.com

-M

[kevinpate]

Old? Dist. court decision was this past Wed. The thread opened on Friday.
I know many folks use the internet for instant gratification, but I thought only fish and house guests were old after 3 days.

on edit - the original article linked by the OP was from about 3 weeks ago. While that is enough time for 100 pages to get ginned out on a tower coming thread, it's not all that long ago.

[Martin]

well... 'old' as in the article that started this thread is dated 1/3 stating only that the guy is being sued by the state... by the time this was posted, the outcome had already been determined.

-M

[Just the facts]

Moral to the story - keep it in your pants.

Life is difficult enough, stupid people make theirs more difficult.

[kelroy55]

Moral to the story - keep it in your pants.

Life is difficult enough, stupid people make theirs more difficult.

I don't think the guy was being stupid because he was trying to help a lesbian couple have a child. He made a mistake not making sure it was all legal. Moral of the story - make sure what you're doing is all legal when trying to help others.

[RadicalModerate]

Perhaps this is all just one of the unanticipated consequences of gay marriage?
(not that there's anything "wrong" with that . . .)

On the other hand, this whole story seems to be anything but "gay" . . .

"Today, class, a new version of The Spelunkian Cave Explorers [insert summary]. . .
"If a veterinarian--rather than a doctor or a lawyer been involved--would the outcome have been the same?"
--Professor Kingsfield

[OKCisOK4me]

Well............screw donating! I'll just continue with the genocide...or will I get sent to jail for killing millions of innocents?

[kevinpate]

Sound advice whether one's pants are involved or not.

[stick47]

Hopefully he will sue for joint custody. While I'm not against the lesbians wanting to have a child, I believe kids need both a male and a female caregiver.

[Bunty]

Hopefully he will sue for joint custody. While I'm not against the lesbians wanting to have a child, I believe kids need both a male and a female caregiver.

I do too, but in the real world you can't depend on it to always work out that way, unless you want to pass laws making it so.

[kevinpate]

Hopefully he will sue for joint custody. While I'm not against the lesbians wanting to have a child, I believe kids need both a male and a female caregiver.

Don't really see that happening absent a huge change in thought processes. IIRC, he commented in one of the articles he had only seen the child once, when he and his spouse happened to unintentionally cross paths with the child and one of the moms.

It isn't a bad idea for a child to have role models in both genders. Someone who doesn't want to be involved however, not so much a role model as a piece of wobbly furniture. Better someone who wishes to take a healthy interest in the child fill that role if the bio dad prefers being raw material supplier only.

[PennyQuilts]

Personally, I'm glad they slapped him with child support. There was a simple procedure that would have allowed him to avoid that and still let the lesbian couple have their child.

Men who willy nilly hand out sperm, create a child, and let society pick up the bills are a pet peeve. He had good intentions? So does the guy who thinks he is in love but that doesn't insulate him from financial responsibility if he later walks away and lets someone else pay for his actions.

A private agreement between this guy and the two ladies doesn't trump his responsibilities to support a child he deliberately created once the rest of us have to pony up. Men who make babies and expect the rest of us to pay for them make me mad. And the lesbians? What were they thinking to do this without available legal protection? They set up their child to have its life disrupted if the natural father opted to step in and assert his parental rights.

[Jeepnokc]

A private agreement between this guy and the two ladies doesn't trump his responsibilities to support a child he deliberately created once the rest of us have to pony up. Men who make babies and expect the rest of us to pay for them make me mad. .

Last time I checked...takes two to make a baby. The woman is just as responsible here for making a baby. She deliberately created a baby that ended up needing state's assistance. I agree with most of your post and the women were just as foolish in not getting a lawyer involved but you should be just as mad at the women here also. Everyone is responsible for their own actions and both men and women should be taking the steps necessary to avoid babies they can't afford.

[jerrywall]

I wonder if the state is so eager to "punish" those involved because it involves a same-sex couple...

[PennyQuilts]

I wonder if the state is so eager to "punish" those involved because it involves a same-sex couple...

Not in my case. I think same sex couples can be amazing parents. This case has nothing to do with the bio mom's sexual orientation. Call it what you like, this man and the mother just decided to have a baby and the child has as much right to support from its father as any other child. You can't simply give up paternal rights and responsibilities because you choose to.

[kevinpate]

I wonder if the state is so eager to "punish" those involved because it involves a same-sex couple...

Nah. State interest here regarding child support is the same path taken with mixed genders. When unmarried bio parent shows up seeking state assistance, the state wants to know who the other bio parent is. Public policy is folks support the children they help bring to life if they have the means to do so. Bio dad here, as well as bio mom and partner, mussed things up by not following the process that would permit bio cap to not participate except as a raw material vendor. This whole multi year mess was easily avoided. They either did not bother to learn the process or decided to roll their own in spite of knowing the process.

[Mel]

Heads up guys, don't be loose with juice.

[PennyQuilts]

I've seen a number of situations where a guy friend donates sperm to a lesbian buddy (each time they insisted it wasn't through actual sex but I am skeptical, not that it matters). Seen some really awful interpersonal, legal and financial repercussions as a result - and a few confused children in some cases when it was handled in a particularly ham fisted fashion.

[Garin]

These women knew what they were doing from the start don't kid yourselves. And it was pretty obvious that the guy didn't want any part of being a parent when he sign his rights away...... Damn lawyers and doctors didn't get their cut and all he'll breaks loose.....