eharmony sued for discrimination

[Martin]

check this out: suit against eharmony alleges discrimination of gays

-M

[Midtowner]

They're a private business, therefore they should be allowed to discriminate against anyone except on the basis of race or religion.

Being gay is (unfortunately) not protected, at least I don't *think* it is for the purposes of the Civil Rights Act. Reading the article, apparently, California has some sort of provision which makes such discrimination actionable... oh well.

I don't read it that way though. I don't even see how this is a civil rights question.

I'd turn to the fact that e-harmony does not discriminate against gays at all. Gays are probably just as free as anyone else to jump onto that site and search for a partner of the opposite sex. So... where's the discrimination? I think it's absurd to suggest that not offering an entirely different sort of service from that which you specialize in to accommodate a particular minority group could be required as a "civil right." That's absurd.

-- I'll bet y'all thought I was going to come down on the side of gay rights... normally I would. I just don't see this as a rights issue. I think whatever the feelings of a certain group of people, I think that it's eharmony's right to only offer a specific type of service and that they should not be forced to totally change what they do on account of someone feeling left out.

[jbrown84]

It's pretty ridiculous. There are hundreds of dating sites. Why not just go find another?

[Midtowner]

Eharmony advertises as (and is as far as I can tell) being unique in the dating site biz. It's a strange business decision not to market to gays. At the very least, they should license their technology to someone who will. I just can't understand the choice to ignore such a large market.

That said, I don't see anything really discriminatory about this practice at all for the above mentioned reasons.

[Faith]

I seen a commercial yesterday regarding eharmony rejecting people. All I can remember, the commercial was portraying a woman who had been rejected from their site, because she didn't do anything for Earth Day, and then a few other silly things..... So perhaps they reject all types of people, not just gays.

[Midtowner]

haha... rejected by an internet dating service. You should pretty much consider joining the priesthood/a convent if that happens to you.

It's as if they're saying... "Yes, we want your money, but there's no earthly way we'll ever find someone interested in you."

[dismayed]

You know, I remember reading something about eHarmony rejecting several people a few years ago, I don't remember why now.

But as far as the topic at hand goes, federal law does not currently protect sexual orientation from discrimination. The Democratic Congress has recently been trying to win support to modify the law, and it seems to have it, but Bush has said he would veto any such bill.

States are free to protect sexual orientation if they so chose, and if I remember correctly a number of states do. California is indeed one of them. There are two things here that may actually cause eHarmony some problems: 1. as best I can tell eHarmony is in fact a Pasadena, California-based company, so California law does apply to it; and 2. the article notes close ties with Focus on the Family, possibly giving those who are suing an "in" if they can dig something up showing some kind of negative forethought in their exclusion. Guess we'll have to wait and see what happens.

[Midtowner]

That's not how I read it at all though. If the site's application has an orientation box where you either check "gay" or "straight," and they kick you out because you check the wrong box, then you're right.

If, on the other hand, the plaintiff if suing simply because the company is not providing a service he wants them to provide, i.e., helping him find a companion of the same gender, then I think you're wrong that there is any sort of illegal discrimination, let alone discrimination at all occurring.

This site provides services for either men seeking women and women seeking men. If it does not ask what your orientation is, then I don't see how discrimination can occur. I'm sure they'd be perfectly happy to allow a gay man to find a woman or a gay woman to find a man.

[Oh GAWD the Smell!]

I'll tell you this much about eHarmony...If you claim anything other than Christian, you'll get zero matches there for months on end.

[SuperScooper]

I think the service is a big rip off. A friend of mine paid the $50 a month to join and then they wanted $200 more to meet his matches.

The problem with our society these days is the fact that we are too self conscious. Save your money and meet people through friends and family. If your friends and family do not know of anyone, step up and ask people out.

If they reject you, get over it. Keep trying. No one ever catches a fish the second they put their line in the water. Paitence, attention and repetition all ways the lands the big fish. Call it cheesey but it does apply in the world of dating.

[Oh GAWD the Smell!]

I MUCH prefer meeting women online.

You get a lot of things out of the way LONG before you would if you met them in a bar or via a friend. Things that would just be too awkward for a first (or third for that matter) date. Things like, having kids, wanting kids, being able to have kids, religion, sex, money outlook, education, AGE, etc.

There are a great many things that are considered "deal-breakers" to many that they just can't ask in person without looking like an a**...But are covered before even talking to a person online.

I've had a couple of great relationships with women that I've met online.

But take it from a dude that's been single his whole life, eHarmony is a really sh***y place. You can't even pick somebody...They pick them for you. Basically, you answer a few questions, and they come up with your "deal-breaker" issues for you (you don't know what they are) and only let you see people that THEY think you are a good match for based on questions you answered 5 months ago at 4 in the morning after a six pack and they answered two weeks after being cheated on by a b/f of 5 years.

I equate eHarmony to being set up by your mom. She doesn't really know what you want, just what she thinks you want based on incomplete information.

[flintysooner]

Plus it is difficult to be honest with yourself and there are a lot of questions.

[SuperScooper]

I MUCH prefer meeting women online.

You get a lot of things out of the way LONG before you would if you met them in a bar or via a friend. Things that would just be too awkward for a first (or third for that matter) date. Things like, having kids, wanting kids, being able to have kids, religion, sex, money outlook, education, AGE, etc.

There are a great many things that are considered "deal-breakers" to many that they just can't ask in person without looking like an a**...But are covered before even talking to a person online.

I've had a couple of great relationships with women that I've met online.

But take it from a dude that's been single his whole life, eHarmony is a really sh***y place. You can't even pick somebody...They pick them for you. Basically, you answer a few questions, and they come up with your "deal-breaker" issues for you (you don't know what they are) and only let you see people that THEY think you are a good match for based on questions you answered 5 months ago at 4 in the morning after a six pack and they answered two weeks after being cheated on by a b/f of 5 years.

I equate eHarmony to being set up by your mom. She doesn't really know what you want, just what she thinks you want based on incomplete information.

I agree with your arguement. I too have met some really great people online through websites; However, this was back in the late 90's whenever 95% of the sites were free.

Now, the singles sites are worthless. The people on the dating sites crack me up. I just love the ones who write their ad as if they are placing an order. Then you have to love the replies that are clearly from competing sites. Lastly, to top it off they want to pay $40 a month or $200 for six months.

No Thank You! I will keep my $200 and meet people in the real world.